Fireheart's Memories
by Smokewisp
Summary: This one chapter explains all his feelings for Spottedleaf when she died.It even made me cry! REVIEWS PLEASE


Fireheart stared as Spottedleaf's body lay in front of him, his veins pulsing with anger.

Spottedleaf was dead, her beautiful fur matted with blood and scars.

Fireheart looked away, eyes flaming, and his fur bristling.

He couldn't help that his claws were coming in and out in defiance.

She was dead!

That repeated over and over again in his mind

Who could have killed a medicine cat? They were sacred.

It made his blood run cold to think about it.

A cat who would kill the cat that had the most connection with StarClan.

Their heart was black, he thought.

_The rain drips cold_

_down the steaming mountain_

_all is lost_

_none is found_

_his heart aches for the scent once more_

_of the sweet Spottedleaf_

_the dream of his life_

_he lost her_

_he couldn't help it_

_his eyes weep for her and his soul hurts_

_he gazes onto the horizon, knowing the previous one was the last_

_to be with her_

_flesh tearing from the bone_

_soul being sucked by the death_

_icy grip closing in on him_

_he couldn't live without her_

Fireheart padded out of the den, his green eyes dull in grief for Spottedleaf. Thoughts scarred his mind, the more he thought about her. He sat down, eating a mouse with no taste by the warrior den. The warrior den...

She wasn't a warrior.

Spottedleaf was a medicine cat.

Their relationship wouldn't work out anyway.

_Your loyalties are divided_

_from your love_

_which to follow_

_is so hard to decide_

_love is one thing_

_destiny, another_

_she chose Fireheart_

_but the end came for her too soon_

_Was she being punished for loving Fireheart?_

_No, it was just a battle_

_at least one cat dies in every battle_

_but her_

_why _her

Fireheart sighed, flopping onto his back. He sighed, closing his eyes. Blackness formed and he wondered whether she was seeing darkness or their heavenly warrior ancestors, StarClan.

What was StarClan like? Starry? Cloudy? He wanted to find out.

Fireheart wanted to die, just to be with her.

_My love for you, Spottedleaf_

_is worth my life_

_I would give anything_

_I would fight every cat in the forest_

_just to feel your wonderful scent wrap around me_

_I'm lost without you_

He wanted to wail aloud but the cats around him, dreary and wounded, looked like they needed no more sorrow and drama.

Fireheart sighed deeply again, slipping out of camp to sit by the river.

Its icy, cold, flowing waters flowed by.

He wanted to drown himself.

_He wanted to be with her again_

_he even wanted to die_

_but would their freedom be limited in StarClan?_

_Would they still be apart?_

_Medicine cat or not_

_love was still for each other_

_they couldn't bear_

_to see each other through blind mirrors_

_of sorrow and dread_

_they needed each other_

Fireheart was about to plunge into the river, when he heard a sweet voice that calmed him.

"Fireheart?"

Fireheart looked around slowly and Sandstorm was padding toward him. Her beautiful, pale ginger coat shone even in the misty dusk of this dreaded day.

Her soft green eyes gazed upon him, "Are you alright? We've been looking for you at camp." Her eyes studied him until Fireheart replied, "I'm fine. Thanks, Sandstorm"

He and her padded back to camp together until he realized that he had one more cat he cared for in the Clan, and that was Sandstorm.

_Everyday I look at her_

_she's wonderful_

_Spottedleaf is still placed inside my heart_

_but Sandstorm is a cat like no other_

_I love her_

_she knows me_

_and understands my life has been scarred_

_she cares for me_

_she won't let a day go by without spending an hour with me_

_by my side_

_on the rainy days_

_she curls up beside me in my den_

_Sandpaw is my heart_

_and even though she's not Spottedleaf_

_even though she's not tortoiseshell like Spottedleaf_

_even though she has green eyes instead of amber_

_I still care for her_

_my soul is put into her_

_Spottedleaf told me not to be blind to Sandstorm forever_

_and I won't_

_I just wanted to say_

_thanks, Spottedleaf_

_for guiding me through my life as a leader_

_and thanks, Sandstorm_

_for being there for me always_


End file.
